The Wacky World of Maternity Clothes

Right now I’m in a mix of maternity and non-maternity stuff — mainly demi-panel maternity bottoms, a few maternity shirts and my longer pre-belly shirts & dresses. I still feel more chubby than pregnant but I suppose I’m rounding out.

All of my maternity shopping has been done online, and I have encountered some really, really odd sartorial options during my browsing. Observe:

Maternity Clothes

Take, for instance, the burgundy snakeskin faux-leather pants*. I can’t really see how those are comfy, but I guess if you wear burgundy snakeskin faux-leather pants while not pregnant, you’re going to want a maternity equivalent.

The jumpsuits are both from ASOS — I actually thought the one on the right was cute, but that’s when I though it was pajamas. I’m not really sure if it’s loungewear or everyday clothing now, based on the model’s shoes. I’d wear it to bed, but not to grocery shop. At least it has a zipper… the other one seems like a pregnancy bladder induced accident waiting to happen.

The ripped up shorts are from TopShop. I have to admit I have a pair of destroyed denim maternity bermudas but a) they are not such a ’90s colour and b) I only paid $3 for them. I can see how these could be trendy but I also think I could find something similar in my husband’s bags of clothing that he doesn’t wear.

The ‘Come Closer’ t-shirt is also from ASOS, and it’s on this list because it’s pretty much the exact opposite sentiment I mentally send to people who are looking intently at my belly. I don’t want to encourage people to come closer! The one beside it is more my style. 😉

Maybe I’m just a boring maternitywear shopper. Maybe I need to buy some leather?

*This post is totally tongue-in-cheek — if you wear burgundy snakeskin faux-leather pants please don’t be offended!
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  1. Kate says:

    OHEMGEE. That last tshirt is killing me! Hahaha – I think if I have babies I’m gonna need one of those. 🙂 I always think it’s kind of presumptuous to just walk up to someone and touch their belly…you aren’t supposed to ASK someone if they’re pregnant, but you can just touch them if you think they are? Weird. 🙂

    1. Shayla says:

      So far I’ve only had two non-doctor, non-husband people touch me and they were both family members so it didn’t bug too much — especially because it was a quick pat rather than a grope! But I don’t think I’m at the stage where strangers know well enough to touch me yet. I have no idea what I’m going to do if someone uninvited touches me, because I’m pretty jumpy and protective of my personal space, and I often flail… but I figure if someone touches without asking (and if they ask I’m probably gonna say no) and I slap their wrist out of reflex, then it’s their own fault… 🙂

  2. Catherine says:

    Ha! This post is hilarious! I remember struggling to try on a pair of maternity jeans once, and then I realized they were skinny jeans! I guess you could just take a cue from Kim Kardashian and dress in larger sized regular clothing. 🙂

    1. Shayla says:

      I hate this in-between stage! It’s rough figuring out what to wear.

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